You Heard It Here First

*On my phone, I keep a list of random phrases and funny things I hear that would make excellent band names. Here’s the entire list to date. If you would like to borrow one for your Swedish psychedelic folk hip-hop group, remember me in your liner notes.*


  • Bust Gussets*
  • A Paucity of Crab
  • The Philatelist and the Numismatist**
  • Terrible McMansions
  • Unwieldy Toddler*
  • Parliament of Owls***
  • Discount Combo Problem
  • Schroedinger’s Form***
  • Good Gut Bugs
  • Bed of Blood
  • Swedish Swimming
  • Go Dutch or Go Home
  • Plato’s Stepchildren***
  • Hieronymous Cock
  • Beloved 2700 Randos
  • Linseed Oil
  • Dendrophiliac Gardeners***
  • Distracted Knitting
  • Cold Pressed Before Juice
  • Jar of Spit
  • White Leather
  • Golden Hour
  • Compostable Pods**
  • Somewhere in Bavaria
  • Constable Jones***
  • Fun Taxation Activity
  • Unnecessary Angst
  • Mississippi Bachelorette
  • Naked Tables
  • Harebrained Ideas
  • The Acetones
  • Happy About Hedgehog**
  • Cock and Fire
  • Noodle Shortage
  • Social Media Suffragettes*
  • Typical Clickers
  • Victory for Upfish**
  • Naked Pillows
  • Fruit for the Road
  • Purple Potatoes and Cheese
  • Golden Dinosaurs
  • Double Discount
  • Street Encounters with Ted Nugent***
  • Ai Weiwei Rodeo
  • Angel Phonograph
  • Bluegrass Punks
  • Angry Elk
  • Wildlife Toile
  • Tundra Morning
  • Indistinct Conversation
  • Platonic Ideal
  • Small Quibbles
  • Tea Bag Repository
  • Hipster Austenite*
  • Neville Likes The Hookers**
  • The Friendly Goblins**
  • Phrenology

*I would like this on a t-shirt.

**Also possible titles for Harry Potter Fan Fiction.

***Might already be in a Monty Python sketch.


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